It's so true that this tendency can be both gift and curse. You have so many helpful suggestions in here, so I'm restacking it because I know I can't be the only one that struggles with this!
I always appreciate your compassionate take on these things, Kerri. I am SO good at the worst case scenario thing, and one thing that has helped a lot is to break it down into disciplining myself to wait for the next actionable step. If I've done everything I can do to work through something (for example, recently I've had to make some appointments and I cannot do anything else until I know the outcome of a few tests. It's so tempting to dive down the Google catastrophe hole, but not actually helpful because I already know the basics). What I could do was not delay making appointments and work to get those figured out quickly. My tendency (especially with medical) is to become totally paralyzed, spiral down a Google hole of "everyone is dying" and then not actually DO anything. So, actionable or not? helps a lot. Also I think it is Laura Vanderkam who talked about how her future self is not incompetent, and I come back to that often. I know I'm good at problem solving, but it's much better to solve real problems than potential ones that don't actually happen.
Annelise thank you for sharing so much wisdom! I LOVE the idea of “actionable or not?” as a quick check-in when things start (I’m starting) to unravel. And what a comforting thought to think of future me as competent. Why is the instinct to always treat our future selves like we will be helpless (hapless?) idiots, despite the evidence?
Wow. I was literally catastrophizing as I opened my email—you break this down so beautifully!
Thanks! I’m glad the timing was Providential.
Yes! - she yelled out just reading the title in her email.
Hahah best comment ever!!
It's so true that this tendency can be both gift and curse. You have so many helpful suggestions in here, so I'm restacking it because I know I can't be the only one that struggles with this!
Thanks, Melisa! It seems that there are many of us out there :)
I always appreciate your compassionate take on these things, Kerri. I am SO good at the worst case scenario thing, and one thing that has helped a lot is to break it down into disciplining myself to wait for the next actionable step. If I've done everything I can do to work through something (for example, recently I've had to make some appointments and I cannot do anything else until I know the outcome of a few tests. It's so tempting to dive down the Google catastrophe hole, but not actually helpful because I already know the basics). What I could do was not delay making appointments and work to get those figured out quickly. My tendency (especially with medical) is to become totally paralyzed, spiral down a Google hole of "everyone is dying" and then not actually DO anything. So, actionable or not? helps a lot. Also I think it is Laura Vanderkam who talked about how her future self is not incompetent, and I come back to that often. I know I'm good at problem solving, but it's much better to solve real problems than potential ones that don't actually happen.
Annelise thank you for sharing so much wisdom! I LOVE the idea of “actionable or not?” as a quick check-in when things start (I’m starting) to unravel. And what a comforting thought to think of future me as competent. Why is the instinct to always treat our future selves like we will be helpless (hapless?) idiots, despite the evidence?
Totally extremely guilty of catastrophizing. I was searching today for ways to coach myself down from that ledge. Great timing; THANK YOU!
I’m so glad it was helpful for you, Angela! Thanks for letting me know. :)