Thank you for this summary and reflection, Kerri. As for me, anxiety often compels me to keep busy. God allows me to experience fibromyalgia, a chronic condition which acts a bit like a physical warning system that literally forces me to rest when my nervous system has been overworked.
I’m sorry to hear that, Angela! Chronic illness and pain is no joke. You raise an important point though- often our bodies speak louder than our minds do, regarding our need for rest! God bless you in the struggle.
I'm sorry to hear that! I had a long season of chronic illness that forced me to rest and although it wasn't pleasant, I have carried those 'resting' lessons forward. Definitely a perspective-shift!
I’ll be re-reading this! Thanks for taking the time to write thoughtfully about something we all seem to be challenged by - I’m inspired to set aside time to think deeply on this.
I'm not too good at resting, though I have forced myself to do it during my adult life and didn't like it. Then I realised that maybe my kind of rest is not the sitting still kind and that made me much happier.
Last year I came across the subvirtue of eutrapalia and that helped some more. I think the meaning is to do something enjoyable where the activity is the end in itself. Then that is the test - if I am doing something for the sheer pleasure and enjoyment of the activity, then I know I am resting. I can play a game of tennis for fun or I can play a game of tennis constantly thinking about improving my next shot and getting frustrated with not being as good as I want to be. The latter is more like training, not resting.
That’s a great distinction, Ed! In the case of tennis, is this playing for fun (for its own sake) or for gain (training)? I didn’t put it in the piece but I think the distinction between leisure as an activity done for its own sake, vs work/labour, an activity done for the sake of something else, is a helpful way to discern our motivations
These are some very helpful distinctions, Kerri! One seemingly small, but very important commitment to making Sunday rest feasible was learning that I absolutely cannot do a Monday commitment first thing. Our homeschool co-op met on Mondays, and it wreaked havoc on our Sundays. It was a factor in the most exhausting fall of my life when my husband was working crazy hours, I was trying to teach a class and deal with a baby... etc... It was just this constant scramble. We did church and a family lunch, and then by the time I got home I was scrambling to get things together and felt pressured and tired. I resented the family time, and was anxious. The weeks that my husband work six days we had no family down time. Never again. If it's on Monday we're not doing it. I need to know that we'll start the day with a normal rhythm and if needed I can put the house back together. Usually by Sunday evening I'm moving towards a bit of a reset so we start the week on the right foot, but the scramble for a big outing was terrible. A long winded way of saying -- sometimes the "small" things really are a big deal! I think Leila Lawler has talked about this idea of planning for rest quite extensively and that's been helpful -- even (especially?) around household work and children and planning to rest in a busy household.
Yes! I remember you mentioning this briefly a while ago and I find it really interesting that I have the same policy- nothing on Mondays!- even though I’m not homeschooling a large brood. There’s something about the need for Sunday being restful being tied to not needing to prep like crazy for Monday, no matter what season of life you’re in!
Thank you for this summary and reflection, Kerri. As for me, anxiety often compels me to keep busy. God allows me to experience fibromyalgia, a chronic condition which acts a bit like a physical warning system that literally forces me to rest when my nervous system has been overworked.
I’m sorry to hear that, Angela! Chronic illness and pain is no joke. You raise an important point though- often our bodies speak louder than our minds do, regarding our need for rest! God bless you in the struggle.
Me too. Chronic illness has forced me to live a life that includes a lot of rest. It’s shifted my perspective on it significantly!
I'm sorry to hear that! I had a long season of chronic illness that forced me to rest and although it wasn't pleasant, I have carried those 'resting' lessons forward. Definitely a perspective-shift!
I’ll be re-reading this! Thanks for taking the time to write thoughtfully about something we all seem to be challenged by - I’m inspired to set aside time to think deeply on this.
Thank you, Emily! I’m so glad you found it helpful. (I must admit that writing it has challenged me about my own practices, too.)
I'm not too good at resting, though I have forced myself to do it during my adult life and didn't like it. Then I realised that maybe my kind of rest is not the sitting still kind and that made me much happier.
Last year I came across the subvirtue of eutrapalia and that helped some more. I think the meaning is to do something enjoyable where the activity is the end in itself. Then that is the test - if I am doing something for the sheer pleasure and enjoyment of the activity, then I know I am resting. I can play a game of tennis for fun or I can play a game of tennis constantly thinking about improving my next shot and getting frustrated with not being as good as I want to be. The latter is more like training, not resting.
Thanks for the article, Kerri
That’s a great distinction, Ed! In the case of tennis, is this playing for fun (for its own sake) or for gain (training)? I didn’t put it in the piece but I think the distinction between leisure as an activity done for its own sake, vs work/labour, an activity done for the sake of something else, is a helpful way to discern our motivations
Thanks for commenting!
These are some very helpful distinctions, Kerri! One seemingly small, but very important commitment to making Sunday rest feasible was learning that I absolutely cannot do a Monday commitment first thing. Our homeschool co-op met on Mondays, and it wreaked havoc on our Sundays. It was a factor in the most exhausting fall of my life when my husband was working crazy hours, I was trying to teach a class and deal with a baby... etc... It was just this constant scramble. We did church and a family lunch, and then by the time I got home I was scrambling to get things together and felt pressured and tired. I resented the family time, and was anxious. The weeks that my husband work six days we had no family down time. Never again. If it's on Monday we're not doing it. I need to know that we'll start the day with a normal rhythm and if needed I can put the house back together. Usually by Sunday evening I'm moving towards a bit of a reset so we start the week on the right foot, but the scramble for a big outing was terrible. A long winded way of saying -- sometimes the "small" things really are a big deal! I think Leila Lawler has talked about this idea of planning for rest quite extensively and that's been helpful -- even (especially?) around household work and children and planning to rest in a busy household.
Yes! I remember you mentioning this briefly a while ago and I find it really interesting that I have the same policy- nothing on Mondays!- even though I’m not homeschooling a large brood. There’s something about the need for Sunday being restful being tied to not needing to prep like crazy for Monday, no matter what season of life you’re in!