Is Quitting Always a Bad Idea?

Three reasons to consider quitting something today

Photo by Nick Fewings on Unsplash

I’m republishing this post from a year ago for new readers. Since we’ve all had time to test out those New Year’s Resolutions, it might be a good time to discern quitting.

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I think most of us were probably raised in homes or attended schools where “quitting” was seen as a bad thing. 

If you tried out and made the team only to find out you didn’t enjoy it, you still had to finish the season.

If you started a book and realized halfway through that it was too hard or too boring, you weren’t allowed to just abandon it.

If you decided to bake a cake, you couldn’t just give up halfway through and leave the kitchen a mess.

Most of us had adults in our lives who wanted us to grow in the virtue of perseverance, who wanted us to develop some grit; and that was a good thing. Children with well-formed characters grow into responsible adults. 

But sometimes the things that are helpful in childhood are not as helpful for us now, as adults. Sometimes, quitting is actually one of the best decisions we can make. 

Here are 3 reasons to consider quitting something, today:

(1) Quitting Can Help Us Persevere

Part of being an adult means recognizing our own limitations. We probably no longer dream of being an astronaut or an olympic athlete. (I hope we haven’t given up dreaming altogether, though!) We have a bit more focus than we did when we were 10, and again, that’s a good thing. We’ve learned that our to-do lists are often aspirational. We’ve learned that late nights and early mornings mean less brain and body power throughout the day. We’ve figured out some things that work for the person that we are, in this season of life. 

When we’re honest about our limitations, we can see that very often, we aren’t actually keeping all the plates spinning. We’re neglecting our health, or our friendships, or our prayer time. We’re burning out, hard, and starting to hate the things we once loved. We’re so tired, it’s hard to think, but we’re trying to persevere! We don’t want to just give up.

But maybe now is the time to quit something. Take an honest look at everything you’re trying to do, and ask yourself what is necessary and what is optional. Can you quit the late nights or the early mornings? Can you quit making dinner from scratch? Can you quit people pleasing and let go of the things that aren’t your responsibility? 

If you want to persevere with the things that actually matter to you, it can help to quit the things that don’t.

(2) Quitting Can Be a Sign of Humility

Some of us are afraid to quit things because of how it might look to others. We’re afraid to be seen as a quitter or a flake. And of course, no one wants to let other people down on a regular basis. 

But sometimes, quitting is an acknowledgement that we aren’t the Savior. We can’t do everything; not everything depends on us. It might even be the case that we step away and…nothing bad happens. Life goes on, someone else steps forward. What then? 

Are we afraid to quit because we’re staking our self-worth in the things we do? Do we believe that we are still beloved children of God, even if we had to quit everything? Is pride trying to masquerade as “responsibility”? 

If you’re afraid of quitting, take these questions to prayer and ask yourself why. Do you trust God and others to handle things in your absence?

(3) Quitting Can Be a Healthy Part of Discernment

In a life of discernment, trying things out is key. We usually can’t know whether something is a good fit for us merely by thinking about it. Most of us don’t marry the first person we spot at university, or buy the first and only house we see online. (These things do happen, but they’re rare, and we set ourselves up for disappointment by expecting them to be the norm.)

Good discernment involves actually engaging with the things we’re praying and thinking about. We need to go on a date with someone before marrying them; we need to inspect a house before purchasing it; we need to visit a school before sending our kids there. 

Sometimes that engagement might be something even more involved, though - taking an internship in an area we may want a career in; spending time with a religious order we might want to join; entering into an exclusive dating relationship with someone we may want to marry. 

And when we’re actually doing the thing we’re discerning (or approximating it) we may realize that it’s not a good fit for us. Then what? Then, we have to quit.

It would be a terrible idea to take a career in a field we don’t like, simply because we had explored that path in an internship. It would be a terrible idea to enter a religious order or marry someone who wasn’t a good fit, just because we had given them a significant amount of our time and attention. In fact, the best thing we can do in those situations is to quit.

Quitting something that we’ve discerned is not a good fit leaves room for us to begin exploring something that is.

Of course, there are times in life when quitting is motivated by laziness or fear or something else that’s negative. But very often, quitting is actually the wise choice.

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Tell me, have you ever felt happy about quitting something? Did you have an “ah-ha” moment of realizing that quitting was actually a great idea? I’d love to hear your experience - comment below.