Before Making Any New Year's Resolutions, Do This
Before Making Any New Year's Resolutions, Do This
#1 in a New Year's Resolutions Series
It’s that time of year again - the time to buy annual gym passes (that we’ll use twice,) to swear off chocolate (for a week), and the time to decide that we really are morning people…. Really.
But what if there’s a better way? What if there’s a different way to approach the New Year?
There’s nothing magical about January 1st - it’s just that the start of a new (secular)1 calendar year is a convenient time to pause and consider how our lives are going. Are we happy with the direction we’re headed in? Do we want to make any adjustments?
This is the first post in a five-part series dedicated to helping you make good (= effective and not stressful) resolutions for the person you actually are and the life you actually have.
Why Review?
It would be foolish to run a business or pursue a profession or take on any kind of project and then never pause to review how it’s going. And it would be even sillier to randomly announce that all employees are getting coffee bonuses, or that we’re enrolling in a professional training module, or we’re buying all new supplies… if we didn’t know how our employees felt about coffee, or what area we needed more training in, or how our supply levels were faring.
In other words, it’s foolish to rush forward with no reference to what’s come before.
So why not take some time these days to do a little life review?
Maybe you’ve been reading along here for years and this is your jam. You love this time of year and can’t wait to escape to a quiet corner with a notebook and pencil.
Maybe you’re not the type to love reflection, journaling, and generally thinking about life. That’s ok - it doesn’t have to become A Big Thing.
Maybe you’re new and really not sure how to do this. Fear not! I have some simple suggestions to make and some simple worksheets for you to use.
A Crucial Caveat
Now, before we move onto reviewing life, and then making resolutions (in the upcoming posts), it’s time to pause and pray over an important question: is now a good time to make plans for New Year’s Resolutions?
Hint: if you’re in survival mode, the answer is probably no. In the throes of things like illness, new babies, house moves, job changes, etc., we’re already wrestling with a lot of newness, even if that’s just the novelty of “how will I survive this new day on no sleep?”
There is no moral obligation to make New Year’s Resolutions. Everyday is a new day - you can start or revisit this process at any point in the year.
How to Review Your Life - Method 1 (Simple)
The simplest method is this: get out whatever it is that helps you keep track of and remember life: a calendar, a journal, a planner, the photos on your phone, library loan history; your email inbox. Peruse it and just remember the past year.
(When I did this, I realized I had actually forgotten a significant piece of travel and work that happened in 2023. It seemed like so long ago, I wouldn’t have remembered it for this year had it not been for my calendar and notes.)
If you spend a lot of your life with other people, you might want to ask them to help you remember the year, too.
Then ask yourself: what worked? What didn’t?
Or, if those are too vague, try: what do I want more of? What do I want less of?
(You can use this worksheet if you’d like: use column 1 on each page.)
How to Review Your Life - Method 2 (In-depth)
If you want to go a bit deeper, or be more thorough, try this.
Make a list of categories that are important to you in life. They might include things like: spiritual/ faith; character/ virtue; time with family & friends; investing in marriage / children; rest and refreshment; hobbies in general or specific ones like reading or biking; volunteering; study/ learning new things; paid work/ career; management of finances; or anything else that’s important to you.
(You can use this worksheet if you’d like: use column 1.)
Take a moment to offer this list of important things to God. Ask Him if you’re missing anything, or if you’ve included anything that actually isn’t needed.
Then, look back through the past year, using whatever it is that helps you keep track of and remember life: a calendar, a journal, a planner, the photos on your phone, library loan history; your email inbox.
As you review the year, write down specifically what you did for each area. Did you pray nightly as a family? Did you take Sunday bike rides? Did you volunteer at the community centre? Did you read 5 articles about how to manage your budget?
If you spend a lot of your life with someone, chances are they’ll be able to help you remember things, too.
(If you’re using the worksheet, write your notes down in column 2.)
Sometimes in a life review, there can be a temptation to feel like we aren’t doing enough, or that we’re somehow failures. But a review is not an evaluation. It’s just gathering information. We’re not yet moving on to considering why things worked or didn’t, so don’t start analyzing yet.
Plus, my experience is that we often do more than we think, at least in some areas. I hope you’re pleasantly surprised by at least one row.
Over the course of a few posts, we’ll explore how to make good (= effective and not stressful) resolutions in a way that works for you and the life you actually have, and not the 22-year old single male influencer with no responsibilities on TikTok telling you that you just need more self-discipline.
My goal with these emails is to help my readers find clarity. If you know someone who would benefit, would you ask them to join the list?
This is the first installment in a series. Find the whole thing here:
Part 1 : “Before Making Any New Year’s Resolutions, Do This” (Free for everyone, including downloadable worksheets)
Part 2: “Why Things Work (or Don’t)” (Free for everyone)
Part 3: “Setting Goals for Our (Actual) Selves” (Free for everyone)
Part 4: “Find Your Method: Six Things to Consider” (For paid subscribers, with an audio recording)
Part 5: “Figure Out When” (For paid subscribers)
The Christian calendar year begins at the start of Advent.
This is really something. "That’s ok - it doesn’t have to become A Big Thing." Thank you for giving the tools without the pressure, Kerri! I'm looking forward to the rest of this series, too. Just saw that #2 is up!